mom

Originally posted 3/29/2019 via Instagram.

I wish I could say this was easy for me. Even after everything, it’s so hard. Some of you know the story, some of you don’t. Some of you have your own pieces, some I have kept as my own. Some of you saw the times where she was wonderful, and some of you have seen the opposite. She struggled for 57 years. There were happy, beautiful ups and deep, dark downs. I’m glad that some of you have loving memories of her and that’s how you saw her. I cherish those times. As a child of an addict with mental health issues, as long as she was living, I still had hope. Maybe one day she’d be clean, happy, healthy. Maybe one day we could’ve had a beautiful mother/daughter relationship. Unfortunately, that’s no longer an option. I grieve over the loss of that hope as well as her spirit. She is now at peace with her mother and father whom she missed dearly, no longer tied to the troubles she had in the world. She’s gone, but not forgotten. Rest easy Mom. I love you. I will always love you. Thank you for my strength. “It’s okay to cry. Sometimes you need to. Get it all out.” -the best piece of advice she’s ever given me.

4 thoughts on “mom

  1. Beautiful post yet totally sad. I believe I understand the ups and downs she may have faced. I pray you the take time to grieve at your own pace not any put on you. Grieving for me was very healing when my granny died. You will always have the memories and I hope over time the good ones float to the top and be a good reminder of your relationship. Hugs, I’m thinking of you and your family.

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